A Journey for S.S.

Welcome back to Taylor Talks!

Wow, I am completely wiped out tonight. The storage containers that will be taking all of our stuff down to Florida arrived this morning, so we spent all day carrying boxes around. Not only that, but a lot of stuff was still in our storage unit, so my sister and I were back and forth bringing van-loads of boxes home from fifteen minutes away; it was crazy.

Now, I can't believe that it's Friday again already... it seems like last Friday was yesterday! This means that it's time for another Foster Parent Friday interview, this time from a woman who wishes to be referred to as "S.S." and wants to share her perspective on being a foster parent.

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How long have you been a foster parent?
"15 years."

Do you do respite, short-term, or long-term care?
"All."

How many children have you taken in over that period of time?
"Over 50."

Do you limit your care to a certain age group? If so, what ages do you take in?
"Yes, 0-10 [years]."

Have you ever adopted any children? If so, how many?
"No."

Did you have any biological children when you started foster care? If so, how many? How old were they at the time?
"No bio kids at all."

What were your biggest concerns as you started your foster care journey?
"That we would be able to love someone else's child (& yes we can!)."

What is the biggest lesson you learned from being a foster parent?
"It isn't easy & no 2 kids are the same. What works for 1 doesn't work for someone else. That having other foster carers' support is a huge bonus!"

Is there anything you would change about your experience as a foster parent?
"No - the kids we have had come through our house were meant to be with us."

Do you have any words of wisdom for future or new foster parents?
"Take one day [at] a time & it is OK to say 'no' to a child & it is also OK to end a placement if it is not working out for your family. Don't let your agency push you into saying 'yes' to a placement. Go with your 'gut' feeling - it is most often the right decision."

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S.S. is not the first foster parent to mention looking out for your own family first. I think that while it is important to do your best for the foster children you take in, and being a foster parent probably means that you want to help as many children as you can, you should definitely pay attention to the needs of your permanent family. For example, with our big move, my parents needed to look out for the best interest of my brother, sisters, and I, which meant bringing our New York foster care journey to a close, and pausing before going ahead and deciding if we'll start a foster care journey in Florida. Of course we want to continue helping kids, but we need to get ourselves settled into our new life and look out for what we need right now, rather than what other kids might need. You can't think of it as being selfish; it's better to look out for your own needs first and then be able to better help children later.

Are you a foster parent who is interested in doing an interview for Foster Parent Fridays? Send me a message through my Contact page and I'll give you the details! I'm looking forward to sharing more interviews in the future to showcase the perspectives of other foster parents!

My goal is to reach 150 likes on my Facebook author page by the time I'm celebrating a year of blogging on July 29th, and it would mean so much to me if everyone could like and share my page. It's as simple as clicking the two buttons at the top right of any blog page, so it only takes a few seconds of your time! As I've mentioned before, when I reach 150 likes, I will share information about the novel that I've been working on, so I'm really excited to hit that milestone!

I’d greatly appreciate it if you would share this blog with friends and family through your favorite social media sites. If you’re sharing on Twitter, don’t forget to tag me (@TayTayK02) and use the hashtag #TaylorTalks.

Thanks!
Taylor

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