It is with a heavy heart that I think about loved ones who lost a beloved family member today.
When I was little, I used to see her frequently. I remember when she would eat Thanksgiving dinner with all of us at our house, along with the rest of the family, and I would put out little place cards to tell everyone where to sit. She was, in a way, a Nana to me, an extended family member. Though she had moved to California and I didn't see her for many years, I always remembered the times that I would see her as a child.
Just a few years ago, she moved back to New York to be with her daughter, who had moved upstate and was no longer living next door to me. When I went to visit my 'grandmother' one time, she took me to see her mother. Without any explanation of who I was, she looked at me and remembered. I was no longer a little girl, but a young woman in college. She hadn't seen me in so many years, but she knew exactly who I was. I'm so glad that I had that opportunity to see her again.
Hearing of her passing upset me for two reasons. Of course it's upsetting when anyone passes away, and my heart ached for my loved ones. But it also upset me that I wasn't living in New York anymore.... I couldn't just take a drive upstate and be with them. Sure, there's nothing that I could do, but I could at least be there. I could have been someone to talk to, someone to hug. Instead, I'm what feels like a million miles away, with nothing but words to send my condolences from afar. These are the times that I hate being so far from family and friends.
Tonight, I send my thoughts and prayers to my loved ones. At 93 years old, I know that everyone will go to sleep grateful for the years that they had with this mother, grandmother, nana. She's in a better place now, and I know everyone can be glad that she will no longer suffer from the ailments of her age. Rest in peace, Nana J.
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Thanks!
Taylor