Picture Perfect Expectations

Welcome back to Taylor Talks!

​Do you know the feeling you get when you're greatly anticipating something, and then it doesn't quite live up to what you imagined it would be? But sometimes, even when it doesn't turn out exactly as you pictured it would, you enjoy it anyway? Well that's exactly what happened tonight when my mom and I watched "Grease: Live" on Fox.

I've probably written about it before, but I love watching the live television specials that have been airing on television the past few years on NBC. Tonight, Fox got in on the action with a live remake of "Grease" that featured Julianne Hough and Aaron Tveit as Sandy and Danny. I've always loved the movie starring Olivia Newton-John and John Travolta, so I wanted to watch the special tonight.

I think that when there is a remake of something, you can't help but compare it to the original. I think that's why I had a mental picture of what "Grease: Live" would be like. Even though it obviously wasn't anything like the original, I still enjoyed watching tonight's special when I separated it from the movie in my mind. It was fun to watch, even though it was so different, and I did enjoy seeing some actors and singers that I like as the popular characters.

I feel like this happens a lot throughout life in general, where you anticipate that something will go according to what you picture in your mind, but then the outcome is very different. Sometimes you lose out on enjoying a great experience because you're so disappointed that your image didn't come to life. Much like my viewing of "Grease: Live," you need to be able to separate your fantasy from the reality that you're experiencing. So what if something is different than you thought it would be? Maybe it'll turn out well in its own right.

Actually, I think that this relates to foster care as well. A lot of people picture foster care in one of two ways: foster parents keeping kids in a basement, only doing foster care for the money (right, as if there's a lot of money involved), or taking in the "perfect" foster children and being able to adopt them and live perfect lives until the end of time. Both of those pictures are very, very wrong.

Let's just forget the negative picture, because I've discussed that in the past... Let's focus on that picture perfect view of things. You take in the sweet little newborn baby, raise him or her as your own, end up adopting, and become a happy family forever. That's definitely not what foster care is. Chances are slim that you're going to adopt every child you take in. You won't take in just the cute little infants, because there are children up to eighteen years old who need a good home. There's also no such thing as the perfect child. That baby that you take in may have been born addicted to drugs, and will spend their nights crying as the drugs leave their system. The toddler you take in may have never been fed enough, and will now steal as much food as they can find, afraid that they won't get another meal. Your new eleven-year-old may be afraid of men, because her bio mom's boyfriend used to beat her. Your teenager may lash out because he's tired of being the one who looks out for his younger siblings all of the time when his mom is too high to care. All of these children come to you damaged in some way, and as a foster family, it is your responsibility to give them the love and support that they need to heal and learn what life can really be like.

Your foster care experience may not be picture perfect, but it can be even better. Things may not go according to plan, but life never goes according to plan anyway. You'll learn so much more from trying to comfort that drug-addicted baby than you would have from sleeps and eats right on schedule. Things may not be as easy as you anticipated, but the reward will be so much bigger. It's hard to go into a new adventure without imagining what things will be like, but if you try not to have hard expectations for what's about to happen, you can really enjoy what life has to offer you.

So whether it's the remake of your favorite movie, the new school year, or the new addition to your family, remember to separate your expectations from reality; the reality will be so much better.

Your continued support means the world to me. From foster care to novels, and family to work experiences, I look forward to sharing more of my life with you each day. Don't hesitate to share your own stories with me or ask me questions about my life. Please don't forget to like and share my Facebook author page as well!

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Thanks!
Taylor ​​

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